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Literature Text
She walked with a swish,
A princess among commoners
In her ballroom gown.
I blushed and turned away,
I was unworthy of such a lady
In my jeans
And hoodie sweatshirt.
But the shimmer of her satin gown
Continually caught my eye,
And I was forced to ask,
“What is the occasion?”
She smiled, gestured to her prom dress, and replied, “Laundry day.”
A princess among commoners
In her ballroom gown.
I blushed and turned away,
I was unworthy of such a lady
In my jeans
And hoodie sweatshirt.
But the shimmer of her satin gown
Continually caught my eye,
And I was forced to ask,
“What is the occasion?”
She smiled, gestured to her prom dress, and replied, “Laundry day.”
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© 2007 - 2024 Heart-Bound-By-Kyubi
Comments38
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This is one witty funny poem! Good flow and open crispy fun style. The humour of prom dress being a laundry day can take on so many levels. Hehe.
I normally don’t like quotes in a poem but this one uses quotes rather well, as if the speaker is poetically telling about a circumstance or a fond memory. Surely the memory of a lady waltzing around in a prom dress among the ‘commoners’ on a laundry day is pretty hard to shake from one’s mind.
But I must ask, who are commoners? Everyday people, or a certain cliche of people (ie High School or workplace). Also I suggest more description on the dress, since a prom dress can mean junior prom or senior prom or graduation (many prom dresses for girls these days I swear! @-@) It'sjust me but it's not that neccessary - just adds more glitter to it if you will.
You intend the dress to stick out right?
All in all, good poem! It made me chuckle about my own prom dress. Ugh. If I had to wear that for laundry day? Fuck no. I’m the type who would wear a bathrobe all day lol
Cheers!
I normally don’t like quotes in a poem but this one uses quotes rather well, as if the speaker is poetically telling about a circumstance or a fond memory. Surely the memory of a lady waltzing around in a prom dress among the ‘commoners’ on a laundry day is pretty hard to shake from one’s mind.
But I must ask, who are commoners? Everyday people, or a certain cliche of people (ie High School or workplace). Also I suggest more description on the dress, since a prom dress can mean junior prom or senior prom or graduation (many prom dresses for girls these days I swear! @-@) It'sjust me but it's not that neccessary - just adds more glitter to it if you will.
You intend the dress to stick out right? All in all, good poem! It made me chuckle about my own prom dress. Ugh. If I had to wear that for laundry day? Fuck no. I’m the type who would wear a bathrobe all day lol
Cheers!